Jill Krause – Formerly Baby Rabies

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This Is What Healing Looks Like

by Jill Krause January 14, 2022

I made myself get out of my apartment today. Took my laptop. I’m typing this out at a booth in Potbelly. This is what healing looks like.

I spent almost two hours on my couch before this. It started out as a nap, which I needed. But it turned into a a slow spiraling depression fog. Have you seen Maid on Netflix? The depiction of her depression, how she gets sucked into and enveloped by her couch while dissociating, unable to escape- it’s the most accurate visual description I’ve ever seen of the alternate reality that is mental illness.

It feels futile to try to explain how impossibly hard it is to break free of that fog. To be fully aware that staying there isn’t the answer, that lulling yourself into a dissociative state will only provide temporary relief, knowing full well that you could just… GET UP. You could just move, go, do something. And still not be able to do that.

I’ve wasted entire days this way, this Tuesday being one. But today was not one of those days.
This is what healing looks like.

I just finished the last of my sandwich. I knew that I needed to get something in my stomach before Barre3 class tonight. It will be my 5th of the month. I dread the classes, and then I’m always happy I’ve done them. It’s not just not looking forward to the physical discomfort of pushing my limits, it’s the anxiety of showing up at a new place with new people, my vulnerability shining bright. But I’m going back, despite cancelling my last class because of that depression fog. I’m going back and not taking the baggage of days before this with me.

And I fed myself- something that’s easy to neglect.
This is what healing looks like.

I’m frustrated and sad and overwhelmed. My hands are shaky from… nerves? I guess. But I am writing this, and acknowledging that even while feeling those things, I still also feel so hopeful, so proud, and maybe even a little at peace.

This is what healing looks like.

I graduated from PHP this week. That was a 5 day a week partial hospitalization program. I know I promised to answer questions about it, and I intend to blog more soon so feel free to comment with what you’d like me to address. I completed 15 days in the program, but it was drawn out over 5 weeks because I was out with covid for 2 of those weeks.

I’m now in IOP (intensive outpatient), and that will likely last another 3 weeks. My med management has been transferred out to my personal psychiatrist. lOP is strictly group therapy for 3 hours, 3 days a week.

I’ll admit that what I feel right now is not what I thought I would when I first began. I thought, assumed… hoped? That at this point I’d not feel frustration or sadness. That I’d have “things figured out.” And I do not. In a lot of ways I’m still the same woman who started the program 5 weeks ago.

But now, I can inhale and acknowledge my discomfort, and exhale and know that I’ll never be rid of it, but that I can certainly live with it.

I don’t know that I’ll ever have a happy ending to write here. No major shift that will decidedly mark the end of this journey, the natural final chapter in a yet-to-be-written memoir.

I could very well spend tomorrow unable to get out of bed. I could very well have a panic attack tonight. The only difference is that I can draw from this experience to remind me that none of this is linear, there is no state of arrival.

There is peace AND there is discomfort, there is growth AND there is frustration, there is hope AND there is pain. I get to choose how to move through all of it every day. Then, the next day, I can do it differently.

There can be more days, better days, more chances.

This is what healing looks like.

January 14, 2022

Personal Journal Style & Self Care

Advocating For Yourself: Uterine Fibroids

by Jill Krause January 7, 2022

written by Jill Krause

Something that’s come up every time I’ve discussed my issues with heavy periods over the last year is uterine fibroids. This partnership with Med-IQ couldn’t come at a better time because I was able to sit in on an informative call with doctors who shared so much valuable information about fibroids that I’m glad to be able to share here with you all.

Advocating For Yourself: Uterine Fibroids

This post is sponsored by Med-IQ. Supported by Pfizer, Inc. and Myovant Sciences Ltd..

First, let’s clarify what uterine fibroids are. Because I know, personally, I’ve been confused about this until recently.

Uterine fibroids are benign, non-cancerous masses that grow in the wall of the uterus.

Symptoms of uterine fibroids may include:

Pressure against the bladder, back of the uterus or top
Lower back pain
Heavy periods
Painful periods
Infertility
Constipation
Increased frequency urinating

Not everyone with uterine fibroids experience symptoms, though. Symptoms are usually driven by where the fibroid is located and how big it is.

In fact, 50 to 60% of people with uterine fibroids don’t experience symptoms, including not feeling pain caused by them. So then the advice is typically to leave them alone.

If you do experience pain, discomfort, and other symptoms of uterine fibroids, some ways to treat them include:

Birth control pills
Hormonal IUDs
Non-hormonal medications during periods
Surgery (telescopes to remove fibroids or ultrasound waves to destroy them)

New treatments are GNRH Antagonists, daily tablets, FDA approved & safe. You can take them for more than 6-9 months at a time.

The best way to get onto a treatment plan is to, first, get confirmation that you’re dealing with fibroids. And we all know this starts with – say it with me- advocating for yourself. So you’ve got to get into your doctor and be very specific about the symptoms you’re experiencing.

Advocating For Yourself: Uterine Fibroids

Try language like: “I am concerned these symptoms may be caused by fibroids.” Be specific how much you’re bleeding and the volume of products you use each month. Share if you’re feeling fatigued. Detail bathroom frequency due to full bladder. Patients should also feel comfortable indicating that they have heard an ultrasound might be helpful in the event they have fibroids.

If you don’t feel like you’re being heard, please push to see someone else. This is especially important if you’re of African ancestry. You can have more severe fibroids and an earlier age, and, unfortunately, care disparities come into play for black women and black people who get periods.

If the only option you’re given by your care provider is a hysterectomy, and that’s not something you want, please seek out care, if at all possible, at a center known for fibroid care. If that’s not accessible to you, seeking a 2nd opinion is a great place to start.

The bottom line is this is one of those health issues that affect many, and a lot of people who deal with uterine fibroids have normalized them, not realizing they could find relief from pain, discomfort, and long, heavy periods. This could be especially true if fibroids run in your family. You may have grown up with aunts and moms and sisters who experienced symptoms and it just became your normal. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

January 7, 2022

Anxiety

How I Wound Up In A Partial Hospitalization Program At Age 40

by Jill Krause December 9, 2021

written by Jill Krause

Hi hi, readers and friends. I wrote this yesterday. It’s not a blog post. It’s a journal entry, and I’ve edited and redacted some parts and changed some names. It could be VERY TRIGGERING and if you struggle with suicidal ideation at all, I would ask that you please click out and come back to read this when you are not in a raw place, or maybe never. That’s fine, too. I AM SAFE and I am in a good place right now, so please don’t worry.

I hesitated to share this here. I plan to keep journaling daily throughout this experience, but I really don’t plan to share much of the very personal stuff publicly at this time and maybe ever. That said, I do want to let you all know where I’m at, what’s going on, etc. And it’s easier to just share what I’ve already written, honestly.

If you are struggling with suicidal thoughts, please reach out for help. The National Suicide Prevention Hotline is 800-273-8255.

December 8, 2021

I pulled back the sunroof in my SUV as the Texas winter sun streamed in and Van Halen’s “Jump” played. I could feel the warmth hit the top of my head and I pushed the volume up louder as tears poured out under my sunnies. They were happy-sad tears, I think. The song wasn’t an intentional choice. It’s just what played next from the 70s, 80s, 90s playlist that was queued up on my phone.

The recreational therapist asked if anyone had Spotify on their phone during our group craft session today, and requested that specific playlist. I would guess it’s a pretty safe bet for a group of people dealing with anxiety, depression, mania, trauma, addiction and whatever other insidious battles land you in a partial hospitalization program. Mostly feel-good stuff, and any songs about relationships were probably too old to feel like they represented anyone or anything any of us had lost.

We made wreaths out of cardboard and cut up pieces of old magazines. It’s something we started yesterday- my first day of PHP. Yesterday, I sifted through regional mags with cheesy full page ads, some Highlights for Children, and lucked out with a single National Geographic, looking for green or green-ish or mostly green images to tear out. It was a half-hearted effort yesterday. It was basically the only thing the entire day that did not make me cry.

And I mean, I cried REAL, guttural cries. Not like tears misting at the corner of my eyes, but deep, sad, heaving cries. I could barely stop yesterday.

How I Wound Up In A Partial Hospitalization Program At Age 40 | Jill Krause

We start every day, in our first group session, sharing a “feeling” word from a very in-depth wheel that starts out with basic emotions at the core- sad, mad, happy, etc. Those are then surrounded by layers of more descriptive words, then another circle on the outside of more precise words to describe exactly what we are feeling that day.

There are a lot of layers and onion references in therapy- that’s a day one observation.

My feeling word also described the trigger that sent me over the edge- the event that made the last piece of Scotch tape that was holding all of me together for years give way. It’s not something I’m in a place to talk about with the internet for now. But, I was able to verbally vomit the entire scenario to my group, hardly stopping for a breath until the very end when I exhaled and started sobbing.

When I described this in the same rapid-fire way- words barely leaving my mouth as a traffic jam of more thoughts pushed them through with such force- two nights before in my evaluation for admission to the program, the intake nurse replied, “So you have a lot of racing thoughts.”

“Yeah. I mean, always. That’s just how my brain is.”

And then he said he could tell I needed a break from how fast my brain worked, and I felt so seen that that made me cry. And then it was kinda like I didn’t stop crying for the next 3 days.

I was so next-level tired the night I finally asked for help. I was in so much pain. My brain and body felt completely out of control. And all I wanted was to stop it all. I wanted to not think. I wanted to not feel.

And that’s how I wound up in a partial hospitalization program. Because I knew the only way – for me, in that moment, knowing all I know about my brain and body in my 40 years of life- to really stop from feeling and thinking was to not be alive.

Partial hospitalization is the next step down from inpatient, and inpatient is what I was honestly preparing for when I went in for my evaluation Saturday night. I had a bag packed, full of all the approved clothes- like things without strings or hoods or underwires. I left it in Laura’s car while she went with me into the admissions office at 8:30 pm. I really didn’t know if I was going to come back home.

Laura, she’s my best childhood friend- the kind that’s like a sister. I spent more time at her house than my own from 7th through 12th grade. She grew up to become a mental health professional, and she’s really fucking good at it.

She and Scott, my not-quite-ex-husband, sat on my bed that night after I summoned them both with vague texts like “I’m scared of what I’m thinking,” and “I really feel like I’m falling apart… I don’t want to feel anymore.” We came up with a plan together.

Then Laura drove me to the nearest behavioral health hospital, the AC blasting, the seat warmers in her new car on. I arrived with a toasty ass, and a frigid forehead. The forehead thermometer read my temp as only 95 degrees. Twice. We laughed about it and the night nurse handed me a fresh paper face mask while he took my purse and phone to store in a property bin. For a brief moment I remembered that we’re still doing all of this through “unprecedented times.”

I wasn’t deemed a threat to myself that night. While I’d experienced suicidal ideation in the past, it had been quite sometime- almost a year. The last time was when I got a refill for my Klonopin. It was only a handful of pills to last me 6 months. But, added to the few I still had, I had a pretty good feeling the total of those things would do the trick if that’s what I needed.

It wasn’t why I filled the prescription. I filled it because I was hopeful about traveling again. I liked to take a half of one before flights. I liked having them on hand in social situations. I hardly ever took them. Truly. It was more me just trying to prepare for returning back to post-Covid “normal.”

Oh wait. I also filled it because it was nearly the 2020 presidential election.

How I Wound Up In A Partial Hospitalization Program At Age 40 | Jill Krause

Anyway, the thing about suicidal ideation for me was that it would come on as my brain simply presenting me with a solution to a problem. I didn’t ask for the solution. I wasn’t actively thinking how to kill myself. But still, my brain was like, hey, here’s an idea. You know, in case all of this feeling-stuff-so-fucking-deeply gets too hard on us. Just file it away somewhere, ok?

I was honest about all of this with all of them- with Laura and Scott and the intake nurse, and then finally with Florence, the therapist who did my evaluation on Saturday night.

Did I want to stop feeling and thinking? Yes, DEEPLY. But was I going to end my life in an effort to do that? No.

Florence- her empathy was radiating out of her and I will never forget how much better I momentarily felt in her presence- she told me she didn’t want to traumatize me anymore by putting me in inpatient if I didn’t need it. And I appreciated that. I made a safety plan. I promised to stay in constant communication with my support people. Then I went home Saturday night and waited for next steps.

By the time I walked into PHP for the first time yesterday- Tuesday- I was raw. I white knuckled my way through 60 hours of anxiety and despair about what the treatment for my anxiety and despair would be like and if it would even work.

So when I say I cried nearly ALL DAY yesterday, that’s not hyperbole. I think it was mostly from a well of overwhelm, peppered with a lot of sadness and a dash of hope and relief, but the staff couldn’t really tell.

Today, Niki, our nurse, told me she was really close to taking me to inpatient yesterday. It seemed in-jest, but at the end of the day I realized just how serious she was. Lindsey, our therapist, told me they had a meeting about me at lunch, about whether or not to go ahead and admit me. That it wouldn’t cost me anymore. That they are keeping a really close eye on me, on my thoughts, on any indication of suicidal ideation.

I promised her that I would be 100% transparent about all of that because the whole reason I was there was because I want to LIVE. But that, honestly, since I started my meds yesterday evening, I’ve felt such a shift, so much hope. I’m not worried about wanting to die. I will go to inpatient if that’s what’s needed, but I don’t feel that way right now.

And you may think hearing that I was so close to being admitted to an inpatient psychiatric hospital would make me feel… scared? Freaked out? Worried? But no. You know what? I felt fucking validated. Because I WAS hanging on by a thread. And someone, many someones FINALLY SAW THAT.

I’ve spent too long gaslighting myself and being gaslit. “Chill, Jill,” is something I’ve heard my entire life, both externally and internally. I haven’t been able to trust the depths of what I really feel. I’ve been told I’m too competent, too smart, too reactive, I think too much. I just need to calm down.

If you could just calm down…

I cried happy-sad tears on my drive home from my 2nd day of PHP today, my magazine page holiday wreath riding in my passenger seat, thinking how happy I am to finally be seen and LET MYSELF be seen, and sad that it’s taken 40 years.

__________________

Thanks so much for respecting that this is really all I’m willing to share at this time. If you want to find out more about partial hospitalization and inpatient options, my best advice is to simply google what’s in your area. That’s pretty much what I did. I do hope in the future I can become more of a resource, but right now I need to focus on the work I’m doing in PHP and healing. I may end up sharing more on Instagram in my stories while I’m processing this. I’m @JillKraus.e there.

I’m turning off comments on this post because I suck at reading and responding to them here anyway.

I still have to work because I have to make $ to support myself and now to pay for this program. So there will be more sponsored posts and other content to come. I’d so appreciate you keeping in mind that writing and sharing those things is not a reflection of what I’m dealing with personally. It’s my job.

Ok, now I feel like I’m rambling. And I’m feeling raw and vulnerable. So I’m gonna stop here. Thank you. I value this community so much, and I truly hope that at least one person out there reads this and realizes you are not alone, and you can ask for help. I’m right there in the scary place with you, breaking shit to live.

December 9, 2021

Parenting

When Your Teen Sets Work Habits- Even Small Ones- That’s a Milestone!

by Jill Krause November 26, 2021

written by Jill Krause

You may be wondering what a teen milestone is. It’s just like all those milestones we looked for and encouraged when our children were babies and toddlers, except now they are fun things like setting and seeing a goal through, connecting with role models, and the one I’m going to talk about today — setting work habits. So kinda like rolling over and sleeping through the night… right??

When Your Teen Sets Work Habits- Even Small Ones- That’s a Milestone! JillKrause.com

This post is made possible with support from the Center for Parent and Teen Communication, part of Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. All opinions are my own.

The Center for Parent and Teen Communication says that setting work habits is a teen milestone, and after reading just the title I was thinking my teen is nowhere near close to hitting this one yet, but then I kept reading.

“A strong work ethic may take time to develop….” Um, yeah. That’s definitely still in development over here.

“And while parents can help teens focus on the long-term benefits of hard work and putting in the extra effort, sometimes establishing smaller habits may help young people build work skills that can last a lifetime.”

Okay! This, we can do, and we have done a little bit. I would say my teen is working his way through this milestone. His work habits still need, well, work, but he’s mastered a few of the smaller steps, like writing down homework assignments daily. I feel like even getting into a routine of keeping his backpack in the same spot at home and keeping track of his laptop counts for this, don’t you?

When Your Teen Sets Work Habits- Even Small Ones- That’s a Milestone! JillKrause.com

For the sake of talking about parenting teens more, I’d love to hear where your teen is at with this milestone (and what their age/grade is if you feel comfortable sharing). Because I feel like this one is going to take quite a bit of time to master over here, like maybe the next 5 years.

Have you had a chance to check out the ? Any others you think your teen has mastered? Any they are struggling with?

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November 26, 2021

Parenting

When Your Teen Seeks Out A Role Model? That’s A Teen Milestone!

by Jill Krause November 18, 2021

written by Jill Krause

I’m back with more talk about parenting teens. If you missed my last post about teen milestones, go check it out! This is part 2 of a 3-part series in partnership with the Center for Parent and Teen Communication, a collab I’m super excited about because it’s a great jumping-off point for more of us to talk about parenting our teens.

When Your Teen Seeks Out A Role Model? That’s A Teen Milestone! JillKrause.com

This post is made possible with support from the Center for Parent and Teen Communication, part of Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. All opinions are my own.

Walking and talking and potty training were all milestones that we knew to look out for and encourage when our kids were younger. Once they hit the teen years, milestones look a lot different, but there definitely are milestones along the way that we should feel just as excited about.

One of those milestones is seeking role models (other than their parents). Has your teen done this yet? My 13-year-old has.

He connected with a coach at his middle school last year, and I will never forget a conversation I had with that coach after we told our son we were planning to divorce. I knew my teen looked up to this man and took what he said to heart, so he was the first person I contacted at school about the separation.

When Your Teen Seeks Out A Role Model? That’s A Teen Milestone! | JillKrause.com

The coach told me he would remind my son that “our team is a family, and we’re always here for him, even if he’s having a hard time with his family at home.” I’m crying just typing it out. I was and continue to be so grateful that our teen had that kind of support outside of the home. His coaches continue to be role models and mentors for him, and I hope that never changes.

This is a teen milestone I’m really glad he’s checked off the list, and I hope he keeps checking it, over and over. “Each new person becomes part of your teen’s support system, ensuring they always have a role model to turn to when facing a new situation.”

If you want to check out . And don’t forget to sign up for their

November 18, 2021

Anxiety Personal Journal Style & Self Care

Has Midlife Also Gifted You Insomnia?

by Jill Krause November 16, 2021

written by Jill Krause

I’m writing this at 5 am, and not because I’m the kind of person who wakes at 5 to write now . I’m the kind of person who put herself to bed at 11pm, tossed and turned and raged for 5 hours, and finally gave up at 4. I’ve been struggling with sleep this year in a way I haven’t before, and I don’t think I’m alone.

I mostly love being 40, but I’ve felt betrayed by my body a lot this year, and the inability to consistently sleep at normal times is a big reason. I’m partnering with Med-IQ on this post to share more information I recently learned about insomnia because sleep is crucial for me, and I know I’m not alone in this struggle.

Has Midlife Also Gifted You Insomnia? How To Treat It

So let’s talk insomnia and sleep, and how important it is to eliminate narratives that tell us we’re lazy or weak or not working hard enough if we prioritize sleep.

Let me tell you, I would not be writing this in the dark hours of the morning if I could be sleeping right now. I’m not here to tell you to “hustle harder” and live off of 5 hours of sleep to make things happen because that’s DANGEROUS to your health.

Insomnia- Here’s what can happen with too little sleep: Accidents Irritability Relationship problems Obesity Diabetes High blood pressure Depression And more

Personally, not getting enough quality sleep is a HUGE anxiety trigger for me, and it can take me days to recover from one rough night (so this week is looking super fun).

Here’s what qualifies as insomnia:

Insomnia is defined as difficulty getting solid sleep, on average, 3 nights a week for at least 3 months. This includes trouble falling asleep, trouble staying asleep, and waking too early and not being able to go back to sleep.

I’ve now added this to my list of mid-life joys to address with a doctor. Anyone else realizing this is something that’s enough of a pattern for you that you should look into getting help? I’m guessing yes, quite a few of you, knowing what I know about my reader demographic.

The National Sleep Foundation says one-third of the population suffers from insomnia, more women than men, and women are significantly more impacted as we age and go through perimenopause into menopause. Up to 40% of women in menopause experience insomnia symptoms. Naturally, we can thank hormones.

That was a bit of a lightbulb moment for me because I have noticed that I tend to have the hardest time sleeping the days before my period- something I’ll be sure to point out to my doctor because it could be a symptom of PMDD (premenstrual dysphoric disorder). Whee!

Has Midlife Also Gifted You Insomnia? How To Treat It

How to treat insomnia:

The recommended first steps are things like regular, light exercise a few hours before bed, eliminating caffeine 12 hours before bedtime, and creating a sleep routine. I think it’s all the stuff we’ve heard before, but probably ignore a good chunk of it. So give it a try first. Be the grown up who goes to bed at the same time every night, and isn’t scrolling on their phone in the dark at 2 am.

But if that still doesn’t work, don’t wait too long to seek help. Insomnia shouldn’t go untreated!

As always, start with a medical provider you trust, if you have one. But also, don’t be afraid to ask for a second opinion or find another doctor if you’re not feeling heard. Not all healthcare providers have experience treating insomnia, even sleep specialists!

Check out this PDF- Sleep Well: A Guide to Beating Insomnia and Getting a Good Night’s Sleep

The drum I bang in every Med-IQ post is to advocate for yourself. I know it’s exhausting, but it’s worth it. Ask your healthcare provider about their personal experience treating patients with insomnia and what their success rate looks like.

A therapist who uses cognitive behavioral therapy techniques (CBT) could also be a good place to start.

Finally, you know I’m Team Medication when it’s needed, and there are prescription sleep medications that could work for you, including a new category of medications that seem to have fewer and smaller negative effects on cognitive and physical performance and less next-day impairment than occurs with many of the other medicines available now. These new medications target the receptor in your brain that causes middle-of-the-night wakefulness. Make a note to ask your doctor about these!

If it comes down to needing medication, it could be that you only have to take them for a short time, or it might be a long-term solution for you. Insomnia is a disease, and it’s important that you treat your symptoms for as long as they are affecting you. Of course, all prescription sleep medications should be taken under the care and direction of your healthcare provider, and hopefully you can find one that’s dedicated to helping you finally get the solid sleep you need and deserve.

Going without sleep isn’t a badge of honor. And fighting to protect and restore your sleep health makes you the opposite of lazy. It’s hard to advocate for ourselves, but we’re worth it. We deserve rest.

SURVEY TIME: YOU COULD WIN $100

Med-IQ is conducting an anonymous survey and would appreciate your input. The survey, which includes additional education on this topic, will take less than 15 minutes to complete. Survey responses are shared only in aggregate.

Your responses to these survey questions will provide Med-IQ with important information about your experiences with insomnia and your care team, which will help us develop future educational initiatives.

Once you’ve completed the survey, you will have the option of providing your email address to be entered into a drawing administered by SOMA Strategies to win 1 of 5 $100 VISA gift cards. If you choose to enter, your email address will not be sold, kept, or stored; email addresses are used only to randomly draw the winners and notify them of their prize.

Has Midlife Also Gifted You Insomnia? How To Treat It

Thank you to @MedIQCME. Supported by an Eisai grant, All opinions are my own.

November 16, 2021

Parenting

When Your Teen Follows Through On A Goal- That’s A Milestone!

by Jill Krause November 10, 2021

written by Jill Krause

The universal experience of parenting teens seems to be that we don’t talk about universal experiences.

We don’t talk about any experiences, so who even knows what’s universal? Remember when they were babies and toddlers and there were milestones we pretty much all expected our kids to hit at some point?

Teen Milestones | JillKrause.com

This post is made possible with support from the Center for Parent and Teen Communication, part of Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. All opinions are my own.

What if I told you there actually ARE teen milestones? The Center for Parent and Teen Communication has, and I’m thrilled to partner with them on a series of posts about a few of them because LET’S TALK ABOUT PARENTING TEENS MORE, YOU GUYS. We’re all out here silently wondering what is normal.

To start, did you know that following through on a goal is a teen milestone? I can’t say that my 13 year old has checked off all the milestones just yet, but he has definitely done this one- more than once- and it makes me so proud!

Remember when we were traveling the country in an RV and he decided he wanted to play ice hockey when he didn’t even know how to ice skate? He spent the next year teaching himself how to skate (on ice in rinks around the country as we traveled and with inline skates in RV parks), then mastered enough of the sport to make a team when we landed here north of Austin.

Teen Milestones | JillKrause.com

He’s now into his THIRD ice hockey season! And sometimes I’m just blown away that he DID THAT. HE made that happen.

Parenting a teen is hard, and we have a long way to go, but seeing him set a goal and see it through has given me a lot of hope. Like the CPTC says, “The drive and determination to see a goal through are major assets in their transition to adulthood.”

The CPTC provides science-based strategies to support healthy family relationships. If you want to check out all the teen milestones (I’m going to share about a couple more here, too), . I’d love to hear which ones your teens have mastered so far!

Also, if you are all about MORE parenting-teens content, delivered right to your inbox, sign up for the

November 10, 2021

Anxiety Personal Journal

Let’s Get LOUD About Periods

by Jill Krause October 7, 2021

written by Jill Krause

This is a post all about periods, menstruation, my flow, etc. Well, that and also endometriosis. It’s gonna be a lot of talk about bodily fluids and I’m not even going to tell you to click away now if that bothers you because PERIODS SHOULD BE NORMALIZED.

In fact! If it bothers you, PLEASE KEEP READING because the only way we are going to eradicate the stigma around menstruation and help more people who suffer from painful periods is for everyone to push through the discomfort of talking about totally natural things that 50% of the population experiences.

Let's get LOUD about periods & endometriosis | Jill Krause

I was compensated by Med-IQ through an educational grant from AbbVie Inc. to write about the realities of endometriosis as a chronic disease. All opinions are my own.

This is the 2nd post I’ve written about endometriosis, sponsored by Med-IQ, an accredited medical education company that provides an exceptional educational experience for physicians, nurses, pharmacists, and other healthcare professionals. Click here to refer to the first where I detailed the symptoms or endometriosis and provided links to resources.

If you’ve been following my Instagram stories over the last few months (saved in a highlight titled Period Drama), you might recall the whole MY IUD IS MISSING drama. It coincided with I’M BLEEDING PROFUSELY, and was punctuated by a diagnosis of iron deficient anemia. I have seen A LOT of doctors since August, and I have had to fight HARD to be heard, to get treatments I feel I need, and to get relief.

My heavy periods, as of now, are not attributed to endometriosis. With my family history of endo, though, that very well could change at some point with further testing.

Let's get LOUD about periods & endometriosis | Jill Krause

Look, it’s High School Jill! And her itty bitty bangs! It was totally “normal” to me to have periods so heavy and painful in high school that I would spend hours in the nurse’s office, and most of the time I’d spend the rest of the day at home.

Enough about me, though. The point of this post is empowering YOU.

YOU have to speak up. YOU have to advocate for yourself. If you suspect you have endometriosis based on this list of symptoms, we really want you to get loud. Talk to your doctor. And if they don’t seem to take you seriously? Find another doctor.

Let's get LOUD about periods & endometriosis | Jill Krause

Listen, I get it. It’s a privilege to have access to medical care in the first place. It can feel impossible to make, keep, and get to a single appointment, let alone several. There are so many obstacles we face when it comes to taking care of ourselves. Please, keep going.

Periods should not hurt.

Have you seen Amy Schumer’s recent video about painful periods and endometriosis? It’s so relatable. It’s dumb that we’ve been taught to just “deal with it” when it comes to period pain. It sucks that many of us have endured for so long before getting help.

We have to keep pursuing better options, and that may not always be something the doctor you are seeing- the one who delivered your baby or who has done your pap for the last decade- can do. There are actually sub specialists who specialize in the treatment of endometriosis. You can and should look to them for help.

Here’s a great resource for looking for a doctor who specializes in treating endometriosis.

As someone with medical anxiety, I know it can be scary bringing things like this up with my doctor, and I often don’t even know what to say. Dr. Erin T. Carey, Minimally Invasive Gynecologic Surgery Fellowship Program Director at University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, Chapel Hill, NC, suggests not waiting for your doctor to bring up endometriosis. Instead, use language with them as simple as, “I’m concerned about endometriosis.”

And then what? What can they do to help you? If you are hesitant to seek help because you worry the only treatments require surgery, please know that there are many non-surgical treatment options for endometriosis, as well. They range from lifestyle changes to holistic treatments to non-hormonal and hormonal medications.

Check out this detailed list from Med-IQ of endometriosis treatments, from least invasive to most.

The timing of this campaign has felt a little like a sign from the universe to me. Shortly after I published my first post about endometriosis, I found myself in my own OBGYN’s office, questioning what was happening to me to make me bleed so much, leaving me in so much pain and so tired I could hardly function a week out of the month.

While I don’t have concrete answers just yet, I have three more appointments on the books for the coming month in hopes I’ll find some. It’s freaking HARD advocating for ourselves, and it can feel… frivolous, I guess? I have endured heavy, painful periods as long as I can remember, and I just assumed that’s normal.

It’s not, though. And I’m not going to accept it as such anymore. I’ve got too much life to live and too many kids to chase #AllWhileBleeding

While you’re here, you should totally fill out this short survey for a chance to win one of 8 $100 Visa gift cards!

Med-IQ is conducting an anonymous survey and would appreciate your input. The survey will take less than 10 minutes to complete. Survey responses are shared only in aggregate. Your responses to these survey questions will provide Med-IQ with important information about your experience with endometriosis, which will help us develop future educational initiatives. Once you’ve completed the survey, you will have the option of providing your email address to be entered into a drawing administered by SOMA Strategies to win 1 of 8 $100 VISA gift cards. If you choose to enter, your email address will be used to randomly draw the winners and notify you of your prize if you win.

October 7, 2021

Parenting Travel

Hard Things Make A Great Foundation | A Lodgewell Staycation

by Jill Krause September 13, 2021

written by Jill Krause

There are milestones after separating that I didn’t think would hit me as hard as they have, and others that seemed to pass without making me feel much.

This summer, one of the hardest things I did – that I’m happy to say I can check it off my milestone list- was take the kids on an overnight staycation on my own.